September 3, 2010

It's different today

Yes, it's a different day. I took a day off, stayed in ample rest, had all the sleep I needed, and I feel fresh. After a long long time, I feel this way. And it's not just because of the day off. I think there's something more to it. I dolled up and went out for a little shopping, more of window shopping, and all the time I did a lot of thinking today.

I have been doing that for a long time now. But, because of my greatly indecisive nature, I can never bring myself to conclusion. I keep on going back and forth between my thoughts and logics, swinging moods, never really reaching to a point. Even when I think that I have made up my mind over something, wait few minutes and I am back to where I was. Sounds weird right? Well, but that's what has been happening every single day, along with all the work, travel and everything, and it has been stressing the hell out of me! Seriously, it has become like a hell. I get frustrated at myself for not being able to bring myself to a decision. I am angry for having no one to talk to, to really talk to. I sometimes really hate myself!

Now, I think, I have reached to a mind set, though still I am not sure. But, for now I am happy for that. Happy that my thinking has given some result. Now, I only wish that I have thought in the right direction and I can follow up on that! I only pray for wisdom and determination now, and hope for good, keeping my fingers crossed.


  1. i hear you... i do that a lot too..ill come up with an idea that i def want to do and ill start it but never finish it. so annoying

    good luck

  2. i'm exactly like you. never reaching a conclusion to my thoughts.
    i'm glad you are doing better!
    xoxo, jamie
    p.s. i emailed you!


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